tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3188762847021889572024-03-19T11:36:58.464+01:00"My Own ThinG"meaning of my nameMyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-7917202265001644632021-07-23T08:15:00.000+02:002021-07-23T08:15:03.967+02:00What’s your Family Like?It is such a long time I came here to write anything. For those who do stop by from time to time, let me say this loud - thank you! I hope my previous posts does still inspire and resonate with you?<div><br /><div>This morning, I woke up very early even though, I went to bed late. I stumbled upon this article below from the Independent newspaper written by Jess Clarkson. </div><div><br /></div><div>As I read each line, I felt I should share it with you. Over the years, as I grow older, I can accept the conclusion, that family is important but not easy. You hear people say “family is the number one thing” </div><div><br /></div><div>However, it is also true, that family can be complicated, messy, simple, love, bitter, sweet, difficult etc. </div><div><br /></div><div>Can you pause for a moment and reflect on, what’s your family like? </div><div><br /></div><div>I am deeply touched by Jess’s honesty about her family and their many struggles. I hope this story would inspire someone to reflect and forge ahead no matter the many difficulties experienced by you from those you call “family”. </div><div><br /></div><div>I promise to keep this blog moving - like the meaning of it. It is my own thing! Have a good day and let me know if you enjoyed the story. </div><div><br /></div><div>Stay safe!</div><div><br /></div><div>My Own Thing ❤️<br /><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/parents-died-cut-out-siblings-covid-b1888972.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/parents-died-cut-out-siblings-covid-b1888972.html</a> </div></div></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-90368573735540227042013-09-11T20:39:00.001+02:002013-09-11T20:39:03.142+02:00I didn't love my wife....I read this post on <span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">popchassid.com </span>- I felt I share it here for my followers and others who openly and secretly visit my blog to read and learn. My blog is about things people can relate with (not fairy tales). Beside it is important not to be selfish but share with people - does make life richer, fuller and fun. Thanks for stopping by. <div><br></div><div>myownthing xx<br><div><br></div><div>Enjoy the post below. </div><div><br></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I’m a ridiculous, emotional, over-sentimental sap. I guess that’s why I told my wife I loved her on our second date. I had tried really hard up to that point to hold it back, honestly. I wanted to tell her on the first date, but I knew that would probably be weird. I still remember her reaction. She kind of gave me this half-shy, half-amused smile. Then she nodded and looked off into the sky. I wasn’t heartbroken by the response. I think part of me recognized that she was much smarter and more modest than me. But as time has gone on, I also realized that she knew something that I didn’t. Like most Hasidic Jews (we both became religious later in life), our dating period lasted a very short time. After two months of dating, we were engaged. Three months after that, we were married. And that whole time I was swooning. This fire was burning in me, a fire that burned just like that second date: I was in love. But then we got married, and everything changed. Marriage, quicker than I was ready for, did this thing: it started sucking away that emotion. I tried so hard to keep that fire going, to keep that emotion alight, but it got harder and harder. I mean, how you can feel that burning love when you’re sitting at the table discussing how to use the last twenty dollars in your bank account? How can you feel it when you get into an argument? How can you feel it when you think it makes perfect sense to put your socks on the floor after you’re done with them, and she has this crazy idea that they need to go in the laundry basket? There was no way I could keep that dating fire burning as practicality invaded our lives. And at first, it drove me nuts. That emotion meant love! That excitement was how I knew I cared for her! But suddenly, life was this grind. Even when I was with her. Especially when I was with her. And even worse, it seemed that the harder I tried to be sentimental and lovey-dovey, the less it was reciprocated. But it wasn’t that she wasn’t giving me love, it just seemed to come at different times. Like, when I offered to do the dishes. Or make dinner after she had a hard day. Or, once we had a daughter, when I shared the responsibility of watching over her. I don’t think I noticed this consciously for a while. It just kept happening. But I think it had an effect on me. Because as our marriage progressed, I found myself offering to help out around the house more and more. And after each time, there would be this look she would give me. This look of absolute love. One that was soft and so beautiful. It took me longer than I care to admit to understand what was happening. But eventually it became clear. Through giving, through doing things for my wife, the emotion that I had been so desperately seeking naturally came about. It wasn’t something I could force, just something that would come about as a result of my giving. In other words, it was in the practicality that I found the love I was looking for. And what was even more interesting was that once I realized this on a conscious level, and started trying to find more opportunities to give, the more we both, almost intuitively, became lovey-dovey. And now, as I’m a bit older and a bit more experienced with this relationship, I’ve finally come to realize something. Something I haven’t wanted to admit for a long time, but is undeniable. I didn’t love my wife on that second date. I didn’t love her when we got engaged. I didn’t even love her when we got married. Because love isn’t an emotion. That fire I felt, it was simply that: emotional fire. From the excitement of dating a woman I felt like I could marry. But it wasn’t love. No, love isn’t an emotion or even a noun. It’s a verb. Better defined as giving. As putting someone else’s needs above your own. Why wasn’t I getting reciprocal lovey-doveyness when we were first married? Because it wasn’t for her. It was for me. An emotion I had in my chest. And even when I let it out of my chest, it wasn’t love. Being sappy isn’t love. Telling someone you love them doesn’t mean that you do. And that’s why my wife just gave me that half-smile. She knew, even if I didn’t, what love really is. And now that I’ve tried to change the way I look at love, the more I become shocked at the messages of love I had gotten when I was younger. From Disney movies to my favorite shows like “The Office” to practically every pop song released, love is constantly sold as an emotion we have before we’re married. An emotion that, once had, somehow magically stays within a marriage forever. I can’t imagine a bigger lie. And I’m saddened to think about how much those messages bounced around in my head for so long. And how much I’m sure those messages are bouncing around in other people’s heads as well. I think that might be a big part of the reason the divorce rate is so high in this country. Imagine a whole nation of people constantly chasing the emotions they had when they were dating. A country of people trying to live a Disney movie. That’s a recipe for disastrous marriages; for a country with a 50% divorce rate; for adultery (the classic attempt to turn the fire back on); for people who do stay together to simply live functional, loveless marriages. It’s sad to see just how common all the above is. How many people are in pain simply because they’ve been lied to. Those people deserve better. We all deserve better. It’s time that we changed the conversation about love. It’s time that we redefine it. - See more at: http://popchassid.com/didnt-love-wife/#sthash.n5eItUIF.dpuf</span></div></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-17385223102336962512013-07-11T11:02:00.001+02:002013-07-11T11:18:05.948+02:00Definition of a Mother!<div>My mother is a gift with love and loyalty she can mend my broken heart and keep me in peace! She fills me with smile when my heart is empty and full of hate.<div><br></div><div>She's my super woMAN without flying powers, red cape and shoes. <div>My mother can relate with me no matter the issue the world has against me.</div><div>When life brings me nightmare my mother bring me the strength to dream on!</div><div><br></div><div>My mother is my Monalisa, she stands strong like an Egyptian statute. </div><div>She shines even when there's darkness! She shines and darkness can't overcome or comprehend her! My mother can run back my past and bring to present those beautiful times I thought had past me by. She's the sun that lights my darkness. She's the legs that runs my race. </div><div><br></div><div>Shes the rhythm of my beating heart. She's the joy that hold me in place. She's the comfort after my many regrets. She's the smile in my pride. She's the one who made our house a home. There is nothing a woman can do to make me a man - that's true but my mother is the Queen who kept the king in me strong! </div></div></div><div><br></div><div>She's the confidence in my stride - she's everything! She's a preacher, friend, doctor, teacher, mentor, counsellor, chef, protector, guide, interpreter, leader, follower, believer, a day care, grand ma, auntie - she can be a brother if I want her to - she has many titles. I am blessed she's my mother! Her name is Evelyn. She's my mother! I am Evelyn's son! </div><div><br></div><div>Thanks for stopping by to read this tribute to my mother! </div><div><br></div><div>With Love</div><div><br></div><div>myownthing xx</div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-39272338717281462032013-05-21T20:32:00.001+02:002013-05-21T22:50:07.763+02:00Genuinely Loving Someone...meaning?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #222222;">Sitting in the sofa this evening in my conservatory I was engulfed by
the thought - life is precious as a result you've to spend it with people you
love and genuinely love you. </span> <span style="color: #222222;">Recently, the subject of "genuinely
loving someone" is something I certainly do find fascinating and
intriguing. Over the weekend, I saw the movies ‘<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derailed_(2005_film)" target="_blank">Derailed</a>’ (thriller) screen played by Jennifer, Clive &
Vincent and ‘<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_(2004_film)" target="_blank">Crash</a>’ (thriller)
screen played by Don, Thandie, Sandra, Matt, Chris etc.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Both of the movies
presented us with some complexities about human relationship and interaction.
The movies postulate the motions that shapes our understanding and human
interaction daily with people. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Typical, I've diverted from what
I wanted to blog about. If you haven’t seen the movies, I do encourage you to
see them (interesting). I do like to
explore human interaction and relationship because clearly it is a huge part of
us as human beings. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Back to my subject today…I asked myself
when you do know you love someone genuinely. Is it when you can't do without
the person? Is it when you can't stop thinking about the person? Is it when
you're so comfortable with the person? Is it when you can go out of your way to
please the person? Is it when you can do anything to make sure the person is
alright? I hope I’m not the only one wondering what loving someone genuinely
meant. Is it me alone guys? I used to have a little love book there’s a quote
that says ‘love is staying up all night with a sick child or healthy adult’<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The various questions I asked above
won't actually give or explain what loving someone genuinely actually mean but
there’re elements of the questions and answers which can be pointers to confirm
someone is actually in love or not. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I believe when you love someone
genuinely you’ll certainly know deep down in you. The excitement and calmness
when you're with or around the person can be an indicator of your genuine love
for the person. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I’ll like to hear from my readers about
what’s your perspective of loving someone genuinely. How can you know you
love someone genuinely? I’m super thrilled and excited to read your perspective
as you try to answer the questions. So keep the comments coming via blog spot
or mail whichever you prefer. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Thanks for stopping by again. Keep
loving!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">myownthing xx</span></span></div>
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MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-49026030810136887412013-05-07T23:22:00.001+02:002013-05-08T08:40:44.893+02:00In Love...the riskiest and richest thing!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I read a story about a girl who
fell in love with her lecturer who has a partner and children. Apparently, she's deeply in love with him. Interestingly, the love wasn't one sided because he’s in love with her. The story was personable, she talked
about how the first time she saw the lecturer what she felt (connection). Some
people both male and female are blessed with what I called ‘lovable spirit’ – people just love them for just being themselves!</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I didn't have the privilege to hear the
other side of her story. I'm not naive because one thing is important, there's always
two sides to any story. No matter what you hear about someone –
as long as the story involved more than one person – you need to understand
there’s another version of the same story!</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Back to my story, I was reflecting and intrigued by her story – so I called a friend of mine to bring
her perspective to the story. My friend
brought some balance from her perspective – it is amazing how you can view
something and another person can bring a fresh perspective to the same thing. This is something I mostly value in relationship or friendship - the ability to talk to someone about stuff and share perspectives - it certain brings clarity.</span></span><br>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I
was intrigued about my friend’s perspective about the girl’s story but she can relate with it as well. She knew people in similar situation and experience. She’s in love with
someone she cannot have – for her she accepted the situation and promised herself to always
enjoy the ‘love journey’ with the ‘person she cannot have!’</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We spoke about ‘love’ what it is and process. I like this quote <i style="background-color: #eeeeee;">‘the trouble
with love is that though it’s the riskiest thing you can do, though it brings
in its wake the greatest pain imaginable, it’s also the richest.’</i> </span></span><br>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My
disclaimer right now – I’m not a ‘Love Doctor’ but my experience in life has
taught me a thing or two about Love. Love can be explicit, other times it can implicit and does seen complicated and need to be unraveled – importantly love can be
time best friend. </span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So here you go...firstly, always know there’s
two side of the story especially if it involves more than one person. Secondly,
your perspective of love can be entirely different from others – so listening
to others as well...knowing that love is the richest!</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I’m going to keep it real with you, because
I know my readers do keep it real with me. This song is for you...<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ZVGV4ZvgSAk" target="_blank">'Baby boy’ BigBrovaz</a> – confession time hmmmmm I had mad crush for Cherise! When this
song came out in 2002, I was in a place where the lyric of the song meant everything to me! I
love this line...'you’re the only one who sweeps my feet and make soul weak...!’</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I look forward reading your comment –
thank you for stopping by. Always remember it is better to love than to hate!</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">With Love</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Myownthing xx</span></span></div>
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MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-73117891946212124742013-05-07T13:22:00.000+02:002013-05-07T23:26:57.913+02:00Welcome back...Life & friendship a treasure!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Thank you guys for the overwhelmingly love I've received from all those who had stopped by my blog openly and secretly looking for a new post. I want to say I'm so humbled to have you guys as my readers. Yes it is a long time I post anything but I'm pleased with this platform because it is 'always there for you' whenever you want to.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I'm truly touched to see Olivia's comment about checking up on me if I'm alive and encouraging me to post something. This blog is my 'myownthing' - the meaning of my name. I'm totally pleased I've a unique name. I vividly remembered a conversation with a dear friend about the meaning of names - I search the meaning of our names - I realized name meant a lot to some people. My friend was over the moon with the meaning of the name - I'll say that's typical though! I was pleased I found the meaning of the names as well - thank you my dear friend for the task! If you ever read this I won't search for the meaning of my name or yours anymore because I certainly do know them now hahahahaha!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Back to Olivia's comment - yes indeed it is important I post something and I promise to regularly update my blog. Life is transient indeed! The last eight months of my life, I've lost people who I consider dear to me. I don't know about you but it is totally difficult when you hear or get the phone call or message that your friend who you spoke to few hours, days, weeks, month ago is no longer alive. I recently went to see my dear friend who passed away last year parents - I saw his mum and dad, I didn't know what to say to them. I'm grateful to God for the courage his family is receiving! I want to encourage you - do you know anyone who lost a dear one - always pray for them! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Over and over again, we get caught up with our daily drama and situations with ourselves. I want to encourage everyone reading this blog, it is important to always put your circumstances or situations into context.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Just in case you're upset or mad about someone - what the person did or didn't do! Always know 'friendship' is a treasure and the imperfections of your friends will always surface from time to time! Always keep the treasure no matter who rusty it has become!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So my commitment to Olivia and other readers - I'll certainly post regularly! Thanks for stopping by - please let me read your comment about what's going on with you. Enjoy life and treasure the 'friendship'</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">With Love</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">myownthing xx</span></div>
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MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-58506233122595340152012-02-20T00:29:00.002+01:002012-02-20T01:26:52.649+01:00Love is better<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Several days ago
a friend left me a message and I’m going to disclose the message it was
a question ‘why do you like to write about love?’. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I’m not sure I replied
the message please kindly accept my apologies if I did not. I felt I should blog
about it. I’m fully persuaded that it is better to love than hate. In my
opinion to love someone is safer and better beside it does keep you alive as
well.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> I do recognize that some people can find it
difficult to love. Some time, it is due to their personal experience - which
clearly can be ‘understandable’ because people do have the right to choose to
love or hate – I reckon that’s a choice everyone has! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My personal
prayer is - dear LORD do not make me hate anyone! Like everyone, yes I’ve
been hurt and betrayed but I've decided not to hate! I realized to hate someone can
be easy because honestly you can easily find something to make you hate someone
because clearly we’re all imperfect bunch of human!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">For some of you can attest that I’m so imperfect – you don’t need to
take a step or two to find imperfection closer to me but I’m grateful in the
midst of imperfection I’ve some amazing bunch of people around me and they do accept
me for me! So tell me why I should hate when it’s easy to love? </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">When I say it is
better to love than hate, I’m not denying that some time loving someone can be
a difficult or challenging choice to make but I reckon it’s rewarding and can
empower you in my opinion.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I would encourage
my readers – secret and open readers of my blog to choose to love even
when it isn’t convenient for you! </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">So my dear
friend I hope I've managed to answer your question, why I blog about love. You
can read this </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/oct/16/love-stories?INTCMP=SRCH" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;" target="_blank">story</a><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">…love is better! </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Love to read your comments always!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">myownthing x</span></div>
</div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-59190167234516429582012-02-04T18:21:00.000+01:002012-02-04T18:26:48.395+01:00Plan B...do you have any?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Life is actually interesting, I read this </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/04/letter-to-husband" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">story</span></a><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> and wonder how many of us can actually relate with it. I reckon many of us do have plan B in our head and even when we’re going with the flow…we still have plan B. For some people plan B is part of their daily routine – they don’t know better. They believe any plan or step – need to have an alternative! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Plan B can be a good thing but most often it does affect our ability to focus and give the desired attention needs for a relationship – can I just say ‘relationship’ isn’t about marriage or date between a guy and girl! The relationship can be anything between two or more people doesn’t have to be marital, sexual or intimate – it could be business, informal, formal, family etc.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I believe in any relationship you’re in, I believe it is important to understand there’s so much you can do and influence the relationship. I always used to tell a friend of mine – where your influence stops, that’s the beginning of someone’s influence! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">At times you can be concerned about the other person and as a result you fail to put the required amount of affection, care, love, and communication etc – those things that makes relationship continue! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Things can either get better or get worst – things don’t stay static. I realised from the </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/04/letter-to-husband" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">story </span></a><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">that it is important to focus on your part and if you believe in the relationship bring your necessary contributions to make the relationship work. Love might not be enough but love and commitment from each party do make a relationship work!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">It is never too late to tell someone what you feel or express your love! Life is short! Keep Loving!! I would like to read your comments – thanks for stopping!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Myownthing xx </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br /></span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-72194463151807192912012-02-03T18:58:00.000+01:002012-02-03T18:58:56.751+01:00I was unfaithful<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">T<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">he street called ‘unfaithful’ for some is very familiar whilst for others </span></span><span style="line-height: 18px;">they've</span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"> not walked through the street or crossed the path of ‘unfaithful’. </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Interestingly, more people are experiencing it as a result there are debate and conversation about the subject matter - you just need to read magazine, listen to news, gossips etc . For some people they shy away from talking about it whilst some people still talk about it and express their opinion very vividly about it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">The reality is that ‘unfaithful’ does happen and when it does can bred distrust, heartbreak, disappointment etc and for some it is their daily experience and reality whilst for others it is can be a distant thing for them because they've not experienced it. </span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">I reckon when people hear the word ‘unfaithful’ they quickly conclude it must be either sexual, intimacy or emotional toward another person. </span><span style="line-height: 18px;">Whilst that is so true ‘unfaithful’ is much more than sexual, intimacy or emotional. </span><span style="line-height: 18px;"> </span><span style="line-height: 18px;">It is important to mention here that someone can be ‘unfaithful’ to him or herself. </span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">However, I would like to ask my readers why people are ‘unfaithful’ it is part of human frailty? If yes, can we accept it when people walk through the street or path called ‘unfaithful’?</span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I would like you guys to read this <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2008/jun/28/features.weekend3">story</a> because it is an honest experience! Life is a journey – no matter the experience keep moving ahead and learn from your daily experience! Thanks for stopping by – my pleasure! I hope I’ll read your comment.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 18px;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">myownthing xx </span></span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-20056543280720375542012-02-03T14:52:00.000+01:002013-09-13T21:34:12.541+02:00Stranger.....<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Thanks guys for your immense understanding about me not updating my blog. I’m so humbled by those checking my blog both openly and privately – thank you. My promise to myself is that I want to have a blog where I can share stuff that inspires people positively. The world is becoming much flimsy and each time you watch the TV or tune the radio like I try to do – you get to hear loads of bad news!<br> </span><div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I want to quickly talk about the title of this post ‘Stranger’ - who’s a stranger? I reckon generally someone you don’t know or know a lot about – is a stranger! In the part of world I live, most people are skeptical about strangers ‘people they don’t know a lot about’. <br><br> My question is how much can you actually and truly know someone? Does not knowing someone affect your generosity or goodwill? For me personally, I’ve resolved in my heart that I don’t need to know someone or spend 365 days with the person to be able to express my generosity or goodwill – life indeed is short! <br><br> I’m aware that for others the methodology is spend a lot of time with him or her – then you’ll know him or her better! Yes, you might know him or her better but I don’t believe it is necessary the amount of time you spend with the person but the ‘quality’ and ‘connection’ with the person – that can unravel the person.<br><br> So whatever you want to do – you simply need to get on with it because you might not have the opportunity to extend or express that goodwill or generosity. <br><br> I would encourage you to read this <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/may/15/i-gave-kidney-to-stranger-experience">story</a>. Thank you once again for stopping by! Oh I forgot, please drop your comment.<br></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Always my pleasure </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br> myownthing xx <br><br> <br><br><br><br></span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-9644116193435239802011-09-22T23:41:00.000+02:002011-09-22T23:50:16.215+02:00Love.....Price Tag<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161; color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC'; font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">Honestly, I should be in bed sleeping but I can't. So I decided to listening to some Jessie's. I like her originality and the meaning of some of her songs. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161; color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC'; font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">Listening to the "Price Tag" single, I found myself asking does love comes with a price tag?</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161; color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC'; font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">I know love mean commitment, acceptance, forgiveness, fun, joy, peace, tears - for me I reckon those are the "price tags". </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">I believe love is far better than hate - so whatever the "price tags" are, it is worth loving. The mistake some people might make is when they're hurt they assumed it is not love. I'm using Jessie's line - forget about the "price tag"......money can't buy us happiness! It is all about LOVE!</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">Enjoy my video for the week. Have a great weekend. I like to read your comments as usual.</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #616161;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: lightgrey; font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large; line-height: 25px;">My ownthing xx</span></span></span></div>
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MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-56438284342758695992011-09-11T21:54:00.000+02:002011-09-11T23:51:48.411+02:00Life...another event<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';">Today is a remembrance
day especially those of us who are old enough to remember the
9/11 tragic incident. The pictures of
airplanes crashing into the buildings, people shouting and crying - that was a
sad day indeed</span><span style="font-family: Wingdings;">L</span><span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Today’s
newspapers, there are writers who said that day event changed the world
especially middle east, travelling, security scrutiny at the airports, public
places, intelligent reports etc<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I just wonder
how many of us have experience event(s) that change our lives...especially in
relationship. Some of these events are not entirely “bad” or “tragic” infact
some are “good” and “lovely”. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">When you
experience a tragic event you wonder if you can survive and after days, months
and years – when you look back, you can say yes I survived it. Whilst other
times you experience event which is good and you don’t want it to end but you
realised as the days, months and years goes by life continues because life is
filled with events...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I want to
encourage you whatever the event either “bad” or “good” it’s important to
understand nothing will remain the same and our lives are filled with events
because they somewhat shape us as human beings.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Do not hold
back to the past....let the past stay in the past and look into the future
because the future is unknown and unexplored. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Thanks for
stopping by...I would like to read your comment...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Myownthing xx<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Bradley Hand ITC';"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I love Jessie J...sharing this song with you..enjoy x</span></o:p></span></div>
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MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-47983112382352520302011-07-03T04:41:00.000+02:002011-07-03T06:25:08.196+02:00Wanderlust......happy travelling alone<p style="margin-top: 0cm; margin-right: 0cm; margin-bottom: 9.75pt; margin-left: 0cm; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; line-height: 18px;"></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;"></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span class="Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;"></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Lately, I've met and heard several people talking about their relationship ex boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands or wives. Often time, what they remember and talk about are the ‘not so good’ things.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">I know in order for me to make any conclusion about their stories, it is important to hear from the other person. Unfortunately, I can’t hear from the other person but I know the person would have something to say.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Relationship is a journey. It is one of those ‘journeys’ that two person embark on with motive, agenda, or objective. I realised each person’s objective, motive or agenda can be more than one, extremely different or the same. The process of aligning each other objective, motive or agenda can be an intriguing process.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">One thing I've learnt in my life is whatever is the motive, objective or agenda - don’t miss the lesson of that particular relationship journey. It is important to understand that not every relationship will last...some relationships are transient. I believe the most important thing is make the best of it and treasure the memories if possible.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Please enjoy the story below – like always I would love to read your comments. Thanks for stopping. Have a lovely week x</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">A letter to....A, whom I met on the internet</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">I may never send this because I'm not really into drama or revenge. Or maybe I'll send it as a sort of belated thank-you letter, for I still feel grateful to you for seven years of support, friendship and company, and what I thought was love. Do you think of me sometimes? I have thought of you, and I have tried to recapture some of the happiness by looking you up on the dating website and rereading your profile. You have not logged in for three years – indeed, I did think you had stopped your membership after we had known each other for a few months. I did – but it turns out that you went on paying your subscription.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">You haven't changed the photo. An earnest expression, balding but with some beautiful white hair, thin lips, a sharp chin, glasses ... I remember thinking you were not handsome enough for me.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Yet when we met, I wanted you immediately. I think we both felt that way – it was what they call chemistry. I could hardly sit still in the restaurant, and when we parted that day, we just smiled at each other and you said: "Now what shall we do?" I almost said, "Don't go", but I tried to be demure and said: "Let's meet next week." When you got home, you sent a lovely email – I still have it.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Over those seven years, you gave me such a lot. You taught me to dance. You persuaded me to visit places that I had never dreamed of seeing and, best of all, you let me cook with you and garden with you and sit in front of the television with your cat. When I was resting on the sofa you would sometimes stroke my hair as you walked past.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">When we met, you warned me of your wanderlust. Long journeys to inhospitable parts of the world. You were happy travelling alone and, anyway, I was not free to accompany you. When you were away, we wrote or phoned daily and I enjoyed your trips at secondhand. You came with me when I paid duty visits to elderly neighbours and relatives. You accompanied me to hospital appointments. When my mother died, you helped with the arrangements and emptying her flat, and you held me close when I cried.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">I had never had this, and the day you told me it was over I wished I were dead. A cliché, I know, and until then I had not grasped what that feels like. As the years have passed I have tried to piece it all together. You said you loved me, but not enough. I have told myself that I very nearly gained the love of a truly kind and honourable man and had known seven years of happiness.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">So reading your profile again on the website, I noticed with surprise that it had been modified in 2004 – three years into our time together. You had logged in and written: "I'm on my travels at present, but don't let that put you off. I'll be back in May so if you are interested, do please get in touch."</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Of course I don't know whether any new woman did get in touch. But now I know that, even then, you were looking for someone else. For another four years you continued to be kind to me – but my memory of those years, as it turns out, is a false memory. Were you cynically staying with me till you found someone better? Or were you secretly struggling with yourself – not wanting to hurt me, waiting till you had supported me through some of the painful times I faced in those years?</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">What have I learned from all this? Not a lot. The past is not always what we think it is. But perhaps it is better not to know that.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;margin-bottom:9.75pt; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">One last thing. That huge vase you brought back from India for me. It is in the charity shop window now.</span><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:13.5pt"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;background:white;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">I wish you well,</span><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"> </span><i><span style="font-size: 11.5pt;mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";color:black;mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">B</span></i><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; line-height:15.0pt"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black;mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2011/jun/25/letter-to-man-met-on-internet"><span style="color:blue">http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2011/jun/25/letter-to-man-met-on-internet</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p><p></p><span class="Apple-style-span"> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p></span><p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Times New Roman","serif""><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p></p><p></p><span class="Apple-style-span"><p></p></span><p></p>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-48509462125202160042011-06-06T23:39:00.000+02:002011-06-06T23:53:13.862+02:00The Love concerns...<p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">Hello everyone ages now I know. Busy with stuff, life can just get busy sometime. This might sound like a cliché but it is real to me....I blog about what I can relate or what people close to me can relate with....‘my own thing’.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">I spoke to my friend few days ago about him starting a relationship but he’s worried about few things which I want to talk about and hopefully hear you guys comment as well.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;">He’s interested in a girl who lives like 24 hours flight away from him. He told me what he likes about her and how she makes him feel during and after a conversation. I'm so happy for my friend because finding true love can be easy and difficult at the same time.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">You must have heard stories where people met their true love without stress while others can be difficult or painstaking – whatever it is, I believe it’s possible to find true love...and Love can be true!</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">My friend concerns are three key things - distance, the extent of the affection for each other and time. After our conversation, I felt people are genuinely concerned about these three things.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">People are concern about distance – you hear people say I can’t date or start a relationship with him or her because you’re not in my country, city, town or neighbourhood.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11.5pt;">I wonder to what extent distance can be a barrier in a relationship? Does the ability to pop around and see the person you’re dating makes relationship work better or best? It is important for people to see each other but </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;">I'm</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11.5pt;"> not sure to what extent. Does seeing each other everyday or easily make relationship stronger and better? </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11.5pt;">I said to my friend that he should focus on stuff within his control and don’t worry too much about the distance (I called it distance-credit not deserved). I feel distance and proximity </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">aren't</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11.5pt;"> the top key drivers that make relationship work. For me, the first thing is the ‘connection’ or ‘bond’ in my opinion that's the base for any relationship before understanding, communication, commitment </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">etc.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;">The ability to understand each other extent of affection can be somewhat possible or impossible. However, it is important for each party within the relationship to be convinced that he or she feels loved and in-love. I'm not too sure what I said to him before I start sounding like a ‘shrink’...but I think I told him to focus on his affection. I believe it is important for someone to firstly be clear on how and what he or she is feeling before that can be translated to the other person as well.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; ">Time is crucial in any relationship. In order for any relationship to begin, the timing has to be right. I asked my friend if he’s aware of her ‘time zone’ – which meant if she’s ready to date or she’s not – his answer is yes. The reality is that every relationship has a timeline. It is important to be clear about your limit in respect to time because time is uncontrollable but time can be maximise where possible. Every relationship on planet earth has some sort of timeline. You can use ‘time’ to know vividly when a relationship is about to end or going to continue. What do you think guys?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt">I wish my friend success because it is better to be in love....</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:11.5pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt">I would love to read your comments please. Thanks for stopping again.</span></p>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-75043583517786254882011-02-24T22:02:00.000+01:002011-02-25T15:50:53.480+01:00Finding Love when you’re not looking<p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span">Firstly, happy new year to you! I hope the year is going on well for you as it is for me. I made up my mind last year that this year I'll be loving, </span><span class="Apple-style-span">optimistic</span><span class="Apple-style-span">, thankful and trustworthy.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span>Few people wrote to me to update my blog – thank you so much. My blog is my ‘own thing’ I try to make sure whatever I post here is meaningful.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span">I read a story today about finding love in places you didn’t expect to find it. I don’t know about you but for me I can relate with the story ‘finding love in places you didn’t expect’ – My love journey is not always the smooth path or happy ending tales but indeed I’ve found Love in a place where I </span><span class="Apple-style-span">wasn't</span><span class="Apple-style-span"> looking .</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span>Interesting, when you find love in such circumstance the realisation that Love is real is just amazing. Finding Love is the first step but also most importantly what you do with the love you’ve found does matter as well. <span> </span>I reckon we all have the capacity to find love or identify when we’re in love but the question is would you protect, nurture and keep it?</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span>Each day, I keep learning the quintessence of Love. <span> </span>I do like this song by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCBM-h-P4PY&feature=player_embedded#at=268">African China</a>...indeed when you love someone tell the person you do....I'm not sure about the ‘walk up’ part <span> </span>but I would say it is important to express it when you can. I reckon we understand the underlying message expressed in the song.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span>This year for me I’ve decided to stay in the place of LOVE.....I hope you do same and enjoy every step of the love journey.<span> </span>If you’re not looking and you find LOVE, just keep it and don’t let it go!</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-converted-space"><span>I would like to read your comment. Thanks for stopping by x</span></span><span style="font-size:10.5pt; font-family:"Georgia","serif";color:#CCCCCC"><o:p></o:p></span></p>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-77245839691065132692010-09-17T17:01:00.000+02:002010-09-17T17:19:43.535+02:00TGiF -Yes You Can!<span style="font-family:georgia;">The message is relevant to me and I don't know about you. One thing I've learnt about myself is - it's not what's happening or happened to me but it's about how I handle what's happening or happened. </span>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">No room for hatred - keep loving no matter the circumstance, incident, event.</span>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Indeed if only you can believe that Yes You Can (YYC) because some how great is His mercies towards you & me. Let this song resonate within your mind and spirit..enjoy TGiF</span>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span>
<br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY</a>
<br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">
<br />Thanks for stopping by and listening....I love you all x
<br />
<br />copyright - Youtube.</span>
<br /></span>
<br />MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-33547157632483906942010-09-17T05:07:00.000+02:002011-02-24T20:35:22.765+01:00The Price of Love?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4D7ECre6FpIzRj7xS83zhAYVkj1Ck5eZmDIVpk_DLZMqxcGnuDTIvTnf2O3whxYvSkngcH5wuBW7rw0JvVk3YuHQE3y2S0MTAWFVz55QmtVlWxxZEqd7YsH9nxhte-LzgWjqKG39V6ho/s1600/Lovers-in-Paris-001.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5517714785247609138" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 192px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4D7ECre6FpIzRj7xS83zhAYVkj1Ck5eZmDIVpk_DLZMqxcGnuDTIvTnf2O3whxYvSkngcH5wuBW7rw0JvVk3YuHQE3y2S0MTAWFVz55QmtVlWxxZEqd7YsH9nxhte-LzgWjqKG39V6ho/s320/Lovers-in-Paris-001.jpg" border="0" /></a><span style="font-family:georgia;">The time is 03.19 in the morning.....flashback of memories invading my mind – it dawn on me that I need to write something. I felt I should title this post “the price of love” because part of the memories that invaded my mind where some what the price I’ve paid or paying each breaking of a new dawn for love. If you’re not clear about my definition of Love you can read my post about <a href="http://myownthing-myownthing.blogspot.com/2009/04/l-word.html">love</a>.<br /></span><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I read that whenever two people come together to start a relationship or falling in love it does comes at the cost of losing close friends, resources such as finance, time, emotions, energy etc. For some people it is a price they’re willing to pay. Whilst for some it's much than losing close friends but also losing family members i.e. parents and siblings. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I sat with someone two days ago and I asked him question about himself and he told me about his life especially the price he had to pay because of love – he lost his parents and brother because of his decision to love someone. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">We all at some point in our lives we must have to pay a price of love. Retrospectively, I realised that I’ve stick or walked out of situation because of the price of love (possibly I can’t afford it, I didn’t bargain for it, wasn’t ready, too much for me, very complicated etc).</span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Is Love worth fighting for? Honestly, I hope you’re not expecting me to answer my question but I guess we all can answer it frankly depending on our circumstance or experience.</span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">In contrast, I realised that sometime we pay the price of love because we can afford it. Other times, we can’t afford it but because we want it we do all we can to pay for it to get and keep it - whichever is your situation – make sure it’s worth it! </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">For those of you that leave me messages to update my blog – thank you so much. For those of you that visit my blog from time to time – thank you so much. If this is your first time stopping by – thank you. I hope to read your comments. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I don’t know what you may have gone or going through – whatever the circumstance or situation keep loving - far better than hatred and the price is worth paying! </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I love you all x </span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><br /><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Photograph: Philip Gould/Corbis</span>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-83917705983710119082010-05-20T17:26:00.000+02:002010-05-22T22:35:49.747+02:00Hurting the One You Love<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKQWeAJTEchUL6eYDTK1eTwM-05EFcTtrBgUm-oOoG6x9M0qIh9ebaB-uQgom4wALgGQZqiq-XBMKQYUCSx6HacgINgVMyfe08-hb5TIklhb0L1eWcef97zqdwAp0o8si4eSgo6pKnQFc/s1600/Experience-Florence-Terry-001.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 192px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKQWeAJTEchUL6eYDTK1eTwM-05EFcTtrBgUm-oOoG6x9M0qIh9ebaB-uQgom4wALgGQZqiq-XBMKQYUCSx6HacgINgVMyfe08-hb5TIklhb0L1eWcef97zqdwAp0o8si4eSgo6pKnQFc/s320/Experience-Florence-Terry-001.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5473374973016164002" /></a><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I wasn't ready to update my blog but I guess you do things sometimes you didn’t set out initially to do. I guess this is one of them! I decided to title this post “hurting the one you love”. I would mention here the stuff I do blog about is stuff I can relate with; things real people are going through. My joy would be someone reading the post and be encouraged, strengthened and comforted as he/she travels through the journey of life.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Recently, I spoke to my cousin’s friend and he was so open to me about his struggles and how he struck his wife several times. I can hear myself encouraging him to curb it because it’s one of those actions I believe by the end of the whole episode you’ll surely regret your action. I guess a lot of people do find themselves in situation where we’ve over-reacted as a result </span></span></span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">hurt someone they love.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I believe you can hurt someone you love intentionally and unintentionally. The un-intentionally hurt might be as a result of lack of knowledge or will-power to stop whatever would cause </span></span></span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">hurt to the one you love!</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I hope I’m talking to real people here – who will get upset to think about the person or people you loved wanted to hurt you. It is important to realised that people are different so their experience but sometimes we might one way or the other expect much from someone and when that person disappoint – you feel really hurt and can react in ways that’s “disgraceful”.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I really don’t know what you’re going through at the moment but I know we all are going through one thing or the other currently in our lives. I just want to encourage you whenever you realised you’ve hurt someone don’t hesitate to apologise or say sorry. Personally, I’m not ashamed to say sorry to anyone I’ve hurt one way or the other because I realised in my imperfection state I’m bond to sometimes hurt people I do love.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">If you’re reading this post and I’ve personally hurt you – I want to say I’m sorry! I look forward to reading your comments as always I enjoy them.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Enjoy the story below:</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:1.5pt;mso-outline-level:1"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Experience: I used to hit my husband<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">'I felt scared and ashamed of what I'd done. I apologised and thought it was a one-off, but it was a pattern that would carry on for the next 10 years'</span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">The first time I struck him was during an argument over money. He'd decided to pay off a loan without telling me and we'd gone overdrawn. I was worried and tried to discuss it with him, at which point he left the room. I felt we hadn't talked it through properly and followed him. The next minute I was hitting him around the head.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I remember losing control and my limbs lashing out. Afterwards he was upset and I cried – I felt scared and ashamed of what I'd done. I apologised and thought it was a one-off, but in fact it was a pattern that carried on for the next 10 years.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat: no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I met my husband through mutual friends at</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><a href="http://www.dur.ac.uk/" title="" style="background-repeat:no-repeat"><span style=" text-decoration:none;text-underline:nonecolor:windowtext;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Durham University</span></span></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">. I was 19 and he was five years older, more worldly and mature. He was less serious, too, and made me laugh. We married five years later. He had a job in IT by then and I started work as a divorce lawyer. The early days of our marriage were steady, but as the stress of my job and responsibilities grew, I took it out on him.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">After that first time, it happened again about 18 months later. I felt a surge of rage I couldn't control. My anger would escalate during arguments over household chores or my husband coming to bed late. I remember feeling I was out of my body, watching myself and telling myself to stop, but I couldn't. I would hit him hard; hitting to hurt.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">One time I picked up a table and crashed it down so hard on the ground that it broke. I left bite marks in his arm a couple of times – it was similar to the way siblings fight, yet he never once struck back. He'd hold up his hands to shield himself, which made me feel even worse.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I know my husband felt emotionally hurt at times – it was upsetting for him to think the person he loved wanted to hurt him – but he never threatened to leave me. He felt there was more to me than this behaviour, and that we still had a strong marriage. I'm a petite woman, a little over eight stone (51kg), and my husband is a big man. Yet he said he didn't feel emasculated, and that I never physically hurt him. While I exploded, he remained calm. I was thankful, but I was also frustrated that he wasn't communicating fully with me. I was using violence to get a reaction. I was verbally aggressive, too. I'd make demeaning comments, sarcastic and personal attacks – all the things that erode love. I'd blame him, preach and criticise.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat: no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I couldn't understand why I wanted to be aggressive to someone I loved. I lacked self-awareness. I now realise the anger I felt was to do with stress and low self-esteem. I was packing my life too tightly, working long hours as a lawyer, volunteering at the</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><a href="http://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/" title="" style="background-repeat: no-repeat"><span style="text-decoration:none;text-underline: nonecolor:windowtext;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Citizens Advice bureau</span></span></span></a><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">and doing soup runs for the homeless. I had what I felt was a privileged upbringing; my family was middle class and I went to private schools. I felt I had an obligation to repay this to society. I thought I should be superhuman and I felt my husband should be, too. To other people I seemed calm and accommodating, a kind of peacemaker. But inside I was pent up and deeply ashamed of myself.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat: no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Eventually I accepted something had to change. I'd heard about </span></span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/domestic-violence" title="More from guardian.co.uk on Domestic violence"><span style=" text-decoration:none;text-underline:nonecolor:windowtext;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">domestic violence</span></span></span></a><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">groups, but only for men. I felt my behaviour carried an added stigma – women weren't expected to be violent, especially high-powered working women who volunteered for charities. Then I found an anger management course on the internet. It was nerve-racking at first, and I knew I'd have to face up to aspects of my life I'd prefer to overlook. Yet the course was a turning point and, by the time it finished, I felt confident I could control myself. Then, two years later, I hit my husband again. I had become complacent, assumed that I'd changed. So when I slapped his face for the last time, I was forced to confront the situation. This time I told my family and friends what had been happening. That they didn't criticise or judge was a huge help. Soon after I decided to go part-time as a lawyer and a mediator, and now I run </span></span><a href="http://stopseeingred.co.uk/" title=""><span style="text-decoration:none;text-underline:nonecolor:windowtext;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">a course</span></span></span></a><span class="apple-converted-space"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">to help people deal with anger and conflict.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">My husband and I are still together, and I'm careful not to choose language that is aggressive. If I ever get angry and feel my heartbeat quicken, I leave the room, but that is rare. I wouldn't claim our marriage is now perfect, but it's pretty good. It's a caring and gentle relationship, which feels like a big achievement for me.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: normal; font-family:georgia;font-size:small;">Photograph: Martin Usborn</span></p><p style="margin-top:0cm;margin-right:0cm;margin-bottom:9.75pt;margin-left: 0cm;line-height:13.5pt;background-repeat:no-repeat"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: normal; font-family:georgia;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Georgia, serif;font-size:-webkit-xxx-large;"><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/apr/17/i-used-to-hit-my-husband"><span style="color:windowtext;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/apr/17/i-used-to-hit-my-husband</span></span></span></a></span></span></p><p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="Georgia","serif"font-family:";font-size:10.5pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-52065132735089797392010-01-30T10:46:00.000+01:002010-01-30T10:53:21.863+01:00Treasures..........<span style="font-family:georgia;">This post isn’t about the request from my friends (who email or ping asked me to update my blog) but profoundly I want to say thank you. The reason I decided to update my blog today is as a result of my conviction about what to blog about. As much as I can I want to make this blog my own experience (my own thing) and people can read and be inspired, encouraged, motivated, uplifted, hope, pushing forward, joy, un-condemned……<br /><br />I heard resoundingly that life is made up of the series of choice we make each day in our lives. Personally, I was caught up in my process of changing my mind-paradigm especially the area of making good, better and best choices in my life in all ramifications. I can’t say for anyone but myself that I’ve made bad choices that I truly regret and I wish I can make a good, better or best choices instead of the bad choices. I’m not anywhere perfect but I can truly assure you that my perfection is on the way – so don’t get it twisted!<br /><br />One of the areas I’m truly working on is about making good, better, best choices about my treasure(s). Okay now, these treasures I’m talking about aren’t about money alone but time, relationship, career, friendship, spirituality, health-wise, - just name it!! So watch the space because I’ve made up my mind about the treasures that matters most and where they should be laid-up which I fundamentally believe would have a huge impact on my choices.<br /><br />So guys you don’t have to cry or weep for the choices you made that wasn’t good, better or best you made already but as I said in my <strong>“<a href="http://myownthing-myownthing.blogspot.com/2009/12/let-go.html">let go</a>”</strong> on post – you got to think about the consequence of the choice that’s before you today to make. I pray God help us to make good, better and best choices as we live in this decade which I believe is VERY crucial!!<br /><br />Please read this story below and learn the lesson in it. Wishing you a happy February – hmmmm the year has started running (TIME) – I hope you’re ahead or running with it? Don’t be behind!<br /><br />Okay now – don’t forget to leave your comment because I’m truly happy to read it.<br /><br />====<br />Depositing treasures<br /><br />"Laying up in store for themselves a good foundation against the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life." - 1 Timothy 6:19<br /><br />Fifteen years ago, I worked for a bank branch in the downtown area. One of my responsibilities at that time was the safe-deposits. This particular branch had four thousand safe-deposit boxes. Every day we had fifty admissions to them, so there were a number of records to take care of. On an annual basis, we would send out a billing to the customers and go through the process of collecting the incoming rent. For one reason or another, there were many who were delinquent in their payments. Sometimes it was because a customer had passed away, and in these cases, after a period of time the locks on those boxes would be drilled and we would take inventory of the contents.<br /><br />It was interesting to see what items the various people treasured-what items they felt were important. Some of the things we found included: birth, death, and marriage certificates, diplomas, awards, currency, medallions, precious metals, jewelry, passports, photos, videos, stocks and bonds, titles, deeds, insurance papers, warranties, receipts, letters, art works, and newspaper articles.<br /><br />All the items had a value of some sort, whether monetary or sentimental, but the persons who had treasured them were no longer able to enjoy them. Items that were once so valuable, so important that they needed to be protected under lock and key, were left behind when the people passed away. They became worthless to the original owners.<br /><br />Heaven is our utmost safe-deposit box. The most important thing we will ever deposit is our soul when we make sure our names are written in the Lamb's Book of Life. Then, as we follow the Lord and work for Him, we are laying up treasures in Heaven. These are treasures that will not be left behind-we will be able to enjoy them throughout eternity!<br /><br />As we go through our day today, let us remember that our work is for the Lord, and our priority is not gaining in this world, but laying up treasures in Heaven.</span>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-60318370979879674332010-01-07T23:15:00.000+01:002010-01-07T23:22:31.115+01:00A Year Gone - Tribute to Dad<div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_-s4v87QIZ24/S0ZdaMzYIBI/AAAAAAAAAUA/xGaGEWZs4Dg/s1600-h/n777388191_1436179_9169.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 177px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_-s4v87QIZ24/S0ZdaMzYIBI/AAAAAAAAAUA/xGaGEWZs4Dg/s320/n777388191_1436179_9169.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424125505909039122" border="0" /></a><span style="font-size:100%;">1943 - 2009</span><br /><br /></div> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">“A tribute for you, because, so soon you left us, after all hope.</span> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">Nevertheless, we are consoled that you had the opportunity to accept God’s precious gift to mankind, and never said no.</span> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">You opened your bounties to all and was benevolent to all that needed.<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">Truth was found with you.<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">Your quietness, we will not overlook.</span> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">Your loved ones miss your counsel, love and care-<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">You left us but the Holy Spirit is comforting us each day especially mum.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;font-family:georgia;" align="center"><span style="font-size:100%;">Adieu Dad”.</span> </p>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-53570081129585562242009-12-24T15:26:00.000+01:002009-12-24T15:40:26.694+01:00Without Him......Merrry Christmas!!<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_-s4v87QIZ24/SzN7FunbARI/AAAAAAAAAT4/44tSw1oXhwA/s1600-h/christmas028.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5418810114999779602" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 206px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_-s4v87QIZ24/SzN7FunbARI/AAAAAAAAAT4/44tSw1oXhwA/s320/christmas028.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I’ve actually not sat down or imagine that one day – I won’t celebrate or speak to my Dad on Christmas day. This is the first Christmas I’m going to experience this. I’m not making a fuss about it but for me it resonate that life is full of surprises (good or bad).<br /></div></span><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I’m going to miss my Dad tomorrow – his presence or his voice but I’m fully persuaded that someday I’ll see him again. I’m concern about my mum because her husband and companion won't be available to spend this time with her.<br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">Christmas means different thing to people, I briefly read on <a href="http://newsforums.bbc.co.uk/nol/thread.jspa?forumID=7368&edition=1&ttl=20091224134340">bbc.co.uk</a> (have your say) asking the question what does Christmas mean to you – you’ll shocked what people are saying.<br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">Personally, Christmas is about my risen <strong><span style="font-size:130%;">SAVIOUR</span></strong> and <strong><span style="font-size:130%;">LORD</span></strong> - <strong><span style="font-size:130%;">JESUS CHRIST’s birthday</span></strong> celebration. It’s a time for me to reflect and demonstrate the purpose he came to this world – <span style="font-size:130%;">LOVE </span>– John 3:16. It epitomizes <span style="font-size:180%;">GRACE</span> and <span style="font-size:180%;">MERCY</span>!!<br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I’m going to encourage you to enjoy every bit the season with strangers, love ones, unloved ones and yourself.<br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pow………<span style="font-size:130%;">Christmas is here!!</span><br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I’m wishing you a <span style="font-size:180%;">MERRY CHRISTMAS!! </span></span></div><br /><div></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">Thanks for stopping by. Love you all x</span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-64614371508213844812009-12-04T14:53:00.000+01:002009-12-20T20:14:40.405+01:00Let Go.....<span style="font-family: georgia;font-family:times new roman;font-size:100%;" >This </span><span style="font-family: georgia;font-size:100%;" ><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/nov/21/adoption-anita-tedaldi">story</a></span><span style="font-family: georgia;font-family:times new roman;font-size:100%;" > made me think about how life, relationship and love can be interesting. Have you ever wondered letting go of something you love or cherish so much? Have you found yourself in a relationship that you really want to be in but you know you’re not good enough and because you’re not good enough the only option left for you is to let go of that relationship. I’m talking about relationship in the “context” of human - marriage, family, work, things, place, memories etc.<br /><br />I’m sitting out looking outside the window as I write this post and flood of memories good and bad springing up in me (indicating my relationships). I know I’ve and still having my fair share of what I just describe above but I believe one of my driving force is ME – I choose to move or press on!<br /><br />Few days ago, I heard about moving or pressing on – forgetting the past. I tweet about forgetting the past and pressing on – indeed some of us need to check ourselves and examine what we’re holding or letting off from our grip. Right in the middle of reading the story of Anita and Dan, I quietly whispered to myself, I won’t judge her but praise her bravery because loving someone or thing involves responsibilities and resources.<br /><br />I believe one of the ways you can be truthful to yourself about relationship and love is when you get to the point of accepting the responsibilities and releasing the resources needed to facilitate the relationship either you’re holding back or freely giving – for me that’s when you’ll truly give an honest appraisal of where you’re in the relationship!<br /><br />I’ve a Love book – okay now don’t have a go at me because I’ve a Love book (disclaimer). I don’t go about with any Love book…..I don’t okay LOL. One of the quotes in the book “Love is waking up in the night with a sick child and not a healthy adult”<br /><br />This quote makes some meaning to me now. Have you ever wonder something making meaning to you probably after some months or years you heard or experienced it? I believe Love and Relationship deserves our attention and whenever we find ourselves - let hope for the best and if it doesn’t work out they way we envisage – let ensure we do our best at that given time and minimize the regrets or feeling of disappointment – hold the memories for the time and let go when it’s due.<br /><br />I don’t know what I’ve just written but I believe as you read the story of </span><span style="font-family: georgia;font-size:100%;" ><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/nov/21/adoption-anita-tedaldi">Anita and Dan</a></span><span style="font-family: georgia;font-family:times new roman;font-size:100%;" > – you can learn a thing or two from it – hope would add-value to your life!<br /><br />Please leave me your comments – I enjoy reading them. Thanks for stopping and reading my blog!!</span>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-90421497953098530742009-11-21T16:34:00.000+01:002009-12-20T20:13:12.668+01:00Would I Marry Again?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZz5pTOCY3uzDD8NLq8WCb7OayslXO1Nnx10B9YoHmEfU3UoL4mmkxlwCQJmG2cUUQaRn1ElIWgaHdZsq18kOSgWHITAt2xop-FUa5S7I0h31CwcUEQZhVfEdSX3H_2ct3FGVaF7SW5Vg/s1600/experience8-001.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5406581808849316434" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; width: 402px; height: 222px; text-align: center;" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZz5pTOCY3uzDD8NLq8WCb7OayslXO1Nnx10B9YoHmEfU3UoL4mmkxlwCQJmG2cUUQaRn1ElIWgaHdZsq18kOSgWHITAt2xop-FUa5S7I0h31CwcUEQZhVfEdSX3H_2ct3FGVaF7SW5Vg/s320/experience8-001.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">Would I marry again is a question some people might ask or asking. Single people it’s a question they might or not consider asking. You might be in a relationship and you’re asking yourself would I date again? It’s worth it? You’re divorce and you’re asking yourself – would I marry again? Whichever category you’re right now – I personally would encourage you to live life purposefully because life is worth living!</span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">My blog is about my experiences, happiness, fortunes, misfortunates, fears, anxieties, concerns, things I can relate with, things real people are experiencing or gone through – in a nutshell it’s my “my own thing” </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I would like to reiterate that my blog isn’t a self-righteous or religious blog. I know people can be shallow and would like to box someone but I always say to people around me – don’t box me because if you do, you’ll miss the best part of me – I try to keep it real. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Personally, I like to think I’m the sort of person that’s genuinely interested in people and I do my best to help if I can. I’ve found myself in situations trying to help someone the outcome weren’t what I expected or wanted. But I must say my experiences won’t put me off learning from life because I’m a great believer that life has a lot in stock for each of us to keep us busy.<br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span> </div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I believe the way I see life has slightly changed after my <a href="http://myownthing-myownthing.blogspot.com/2009/04/where-is-your-dad.html">Dad’s</a> death. I talked about my Dad’s death because I personally feel I’ve not done one percent of what he’d for me, he was a good man but not perfect. I believe the stuff I blog about or stories I share are things I can or might relate with, things real people experiencing or experienced which I can learn from – don’t judge them. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">You reading this today might relate with part of her story in your own way but I believe we can learn a thing or two from her story. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I don’t dislike fiction stories but I’m a fan of non-fiction (REAL). Life is worth living and whatever you’re doing or going through just make sure you give your best if possible.<br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"></span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">I would like to say ta much for stopping and leave your comments x</span></div><div><span style="font-family:georgia;"><br />====<br /><br />'I convinced myself that no one would know and that I was simply helping someone I loved'<br />I met Adam when I was 22: I'd been searching for a man who could love me despite my lack of confidence and mood swings. He was three years older than me and seemed to have the stability I craved. I had recently completed a three-month rehabilitation programme to treat my drug and alcohol dependence. At last I'd found someone who supported me through my tears and the insecurities that my friends had found so difficult to cope with. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Adam never drank alcohol and had a close family. I, on the other hand, grew up in a one-parent family, my mother having left when I was five. I went to a Christian faith school, and my father was law-abiding and had instilled the same in me. But by my early 20s I was an alcoholic.<br />I moved in with Adam, but I wasn't happy. I trusted no one and depression left me feeling worthless. Our relationship was troubled and I'd start arguments; yet time and again Adam would ask me to marry him, believing it was the much-needed bond to keep us together. Each time I would refuse him. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">After 18 months and yet another heated row, he left me. I became hysterical and begged him to come back, but he refused. In my panic I agreed to marry him, convincing myself I was doing the right thing.<br />Four weeks later, tears ran down my cheeks in the register office as I said "I do" in front of four of Adam's friends. I kept the wedding secret from my father and friends. Immediately after the ceremony, I regretted what I'd done. I didn't know if I loved my new husband, but I did know this was not how a marriage was supposed to start. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">As the days passed my anxiety grew. I didn't want to be married. Two weeks later I jumped on a train to London and stayed with a friend, determined to start afresh. I changed my phone number and didn't see my husband again. I hated myself for hurting him and my priority each day was drinking enough to forget. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">A number of years passed and I immersed myself in alcohol and drugs to shield myself from reality. I decided to leave London and I flew to the Gambia for a break. Within weeks, I met Hassan and we fell in love. I moved into the pool house of his family home where we lived for seven months. By now, everything felt more stable; I had stopped using drugs, although I still drank. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">We were the same age and we talked about starting a family and living between the Gambia and England, but he needed a visa to enter the UK. The simplest way to get this was to be married to a British national. I wanted to help and feared that if he knew I was already married, he'd leave me. Finally, after many battles, I said yes. I tried to ignore the nausea I felt, knowing I was still legally married. I convinced myself no one would know and that I was simply helping someone I loved. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Hassan's family made all the arrangements, so the magnitude of my decision did not hit me until after the ceremony. Once we had exchanged rings, I wanted to vanish. Every day I was in tears. I knew what I had done was illegal, but I had also broken holy laws regarding the sanctity of marriage, which I had grown up believing in. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Fearing for my sanity, I came back to London five days later, alone. I suffered panic attacks and considered confessing to the police – but I decided to get drunk instead. That continued for three months, before I admitted myself into rehab. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Why did I marry one man while I was still married to another? It's a question I struggle with and, in truth, I'm still not sure. People probably assume that women who behave like this are desperate for attention or maybe addicted to the thrill of getting married. For me it was neither. I was confused and deeply insecure, and partly it was just an urgent need not to be alone. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">I stopped drinking five years ago, aged 27, and around the same time I told each man about the other. Both Adam and Hassan thought me "silly", not malicious; miraculously neither was angry, just sad. </span></div><div><br /><span style="font-family:georgia;">Once both divorces were finalised, I didn't celebrate: I had a quiet moment of contemplation and shed tears of gratitude for having found sobriety and some self-esteem.<br />Would I marry again? Yes. My new ability to make choices free from desperate insecurity will, I hope, let me be honest about my past with a future partner, leaving my experience where it belongs – behind me.<br /></span></div><br /><div><span style="font-family:georgia;">http://www.guardian.co.uk</span><span style="font-family:georgia;"><br />Photograph: David Levene</span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-68308978010797752842009-11-03T13:55:00.000+01:002009-11-03T21:02:45.311+01:00Who said? Lessons of Life…<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzwmWx3wEsHHYa8lHgby4RDNk94-Qt_IDGpMRm1Dwp3iCleNgtSxoroZaULGY9t-l9VXRJ54P-j6NQkrEjQLMeJ8g_csrABvAGqSsQvK0bHhEDMCHnsLxJvoZvE0dPsNLGoBaYAgx3ksE/s1600-h/untitled.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5399861077730689090" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; width: 387px; height: 217px; text-align: center;" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzwmWx3wEsHHYa8lHgby4RDNk94-Qt_IDGpMRm1Dwp3iCleNgtSxoroZaULGY9t-l9VXRJ54P-j6NQkrEjQLMeJ8g_csrABvAGqSsQvK0bHhEDMCHnsLxJvoZvE0dPsNLGoBaYAgx3ksE/s320/untitled.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Who said life can’t surprise you? Who said the person you love can’t surprise you? Who said life isn’t interesting? Who said life can’t continue? Who said we can’t forgive? Who said there is no hope for you? Who said your circumstance can’t change from better to worst? Who said there is no light in the tunnel? Who said breakable things can’t be kept carelessly? Who said life is over without that one? </span></div><div style="font-family: georgia;"> </div><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Whatever or wherever you’re right now – keep appreciating life and enjoy each day ~ keep living!! I would love to read your comments. You can get your mates to read this story and make your comment. True confession – I love reading your comments:-)<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I'd just put the kettle on when the doorbell rang. I was working at home that day and could have done without the interruption, but for no particular reason I felt unusually cheerful and optimistic, as if nothing could put me off my stride. Over the next half-hour, that would change, but I had no inkling of the enormity of the event that was about to unfold.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I opened the front door to find Lora, my friend, standing there, eyes red-rimmed. Lora was the most ceaselessly happy person I knew. Something was definitely up. I sat her on a chair in the kitchen while I finished making the tea, shaken to see her in such a state but almost afraid to ask what had caused it. "It's Sam," she sobbed. "I think he's having an affair." What little remained of my good mood disappeared under a dark cloud.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Lora was married to my best friend, Sam. She was best friends with my wife, Dawn. Our children were best friends, too. It would have been hard to find two families who were closer without being related by blood. This had been the case for many years. We'd go on holiday together, share problems, recipes, clothes and colds. We penciled in so much down time – down the pub in the case of Sam and me – our families' meshed lives had the feel of a benignly plotted soap.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">A little calmer after a cup of tea, Lora asked where Dawn was. I'd suspected it was Dawn's shoulder she wanted to cry on. I said I wasn't sure; she'd popped out for a while. Then the doorbell rang again. This time, as I walked down the hall, my knees felt as if they wanted to buckle under a gathering weight of foreboding, the sense that something was terribly wrong and that these moments were an inescapable part of its realization.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Dawn and Sam were at the door; I'd seen them together a thousand times before and, for a fraction of a second, my sense of rising panic relaxed its grip. Then I looked down. They were holding hands. I gestured for them to go through, my body now so limp with shock I could barely close the door behind them. There was an awful inevitability to what was coming next. "Oh no. Oh no," was all I could think, over and over. This couldn't be happening.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I sat down and squeezed Lora's hand, both of us now stunned into tearful silence as they stood in front of us. In what remains the most surreal five minutes of my life, they delivered their vision of what was going to happen from this moment on. The affair had been active for a couple of months; the mutual affection it grew out of had been there for much longer, possibly since the day they met. They said they wanted us to get divorced so they could get married – houses sold, proceedings and children split, a new marital home for the happy couple bought and furnished with reasonable haste. More than 40 years of <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/marriage">marriage</a> between the four of us was reduced to rubble in a handful of sentences. Had I seen it coming? No. Did I miss the signs? There weren't any.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">The proficiency of the concealment somehow squared with the measured detachment of the announcement. They showed no emotion, as if deliberately distancing themselves from the effects of their revelation. Perhaps it was the only way they could confront us. Lora and I said nothing. We were too stunned to speak. And that was that. Dawn and Sam let themselves out. Whether they were still holding hands I couldn't say.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Nothing can prepare you for the inevitable collateral damage when families break apart. But much of what Dawn and Sam decreed that dark afternoon came to pass and, if I'm honest, made all our lives better in the long run. In the next few years, both Lora and I found happiness in new marriages and the children remain the best of friends, some now leading their own married lives. After a few short <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/relationships">relationships</a>, I met my current partner and sold the flat I bought after the <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/divorce">divorce</a> to live with her. It doesn't feel quite like a happy ending, but I'm full of hope.<br /></span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I still speak to Sam. No, the friendship didn't survive intact – how could it? – but over time the anger and resentment has faded and, today, a few threads remain. Occasionally, at family gatherings, we have a beer together. The betrayal has never been mentioned and, for the sake of all our new beginnings, perhaps it never will.</span></div><span style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family: georgia;">Reference:</span><br /><br /></span><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Photograph: Mark Chilvers</span></div><div style="font-family: georgia;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><br />http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/oct/31/wife-left-me-for-my-best-friend</span></div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-318876284702188957.post-59988437905649756092009-10-19T16:55:00.000+02:002009-10-19T20:48:17.797+02:00A letter to ... my ex-husband, wherever he is<div id="article-wrapper" style="font-family:georgia;"> <p><span style="font-size:100%;">Chilling and reading as usual, I found myself reading the below letter from guardian.co.uk. I've this special love for guardian newspaper, because of the quality of the news and articles and the size of course. One of my highlights travelling to or within in the UK possibly any BA flight is having to pick a guardian newpaper, read each page of the newspaper. I just love how the writers delivers their stories!</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">I've the guardian.co.uk app in my phone and I read guardian everyday. I wish I do read my Bible ~ but I'm going to leave that for another day.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">I read this letter from this woman, I realised it can happen to each of us....I wonder what life is about and why our experiences and situations are different and unique. One thing I'm confident about is that no matter what, life is worth living!!<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">Indeed, life can throw stuffs at you, you just never expect. I went to see a friend who dad passed away recently. I saw his frustration and disappointment which I can relate with because my dad passed away as well this year. Some times you think in your subconscious that your parents are all going be alive, stay together, wealthy or poor - but what if they don't?<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">Some how and some where life continues...I really don't know what and how but whatever you're going through just be positive and believe life is worth living!<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">I want to express my appreciation to my mentor DC - thank you so much!<br /></span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">I love you all - thanks for stopping by - would love to read your comment.<br /></span></p><p style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-size:100%;">The letter I always wanted to write</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">This year would have been our golden wedding year – we didn't even make 15. I wonder how we would have celebrated and I wonder how surprised you would be to know that you have six grandchildren from the five children you abandoned. I can, maybe, understand why you no longer wanted me in your life, but to leave five children (aged nine months to nine years) and never want to see them again I find truly incredible. When you met anyone new and they asked about your family<a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/family"></a>, did you deny our existence? When you looked in the mirror every morning as you shaved your oh-too-handsome face did you wonder, ever, if those progeny were thriving or starving?</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">As birthdays and Christmases came around did you never consider sending them a card? Your favourite child's birthday is on Boxing Day and I just could not believe that you could forget that. The youngest two cannot remember your presence in their lives.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">My natural curiosity wants answers to so many questions. Where are you? Are you even alive? Why did you never honour the court order for maintenance but, much more importantly, did you not love them enough to <em>want </em>to support and see them? You were a good, kind and tender father so it made it all the stranger that you abandoned them.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">So, instead of a gold watch, I am going to give you a short report on what you have missed. All five children have survived, two sons and three daughters. You could be proud of them all for although you did not give them your presence through all those formative years, I cannot deny your genetic contribution. I could not even if I wanted to as both your sons are almost clones of you. Spookily, they have many of your mannerisms, which cannot have possibly been learned; they gesticulate wildly with their hands as they tell a story, just as you always did.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">When you left me that day with a rubber cheque for £40 and a house soon to be repossessed, I could not have dreamed of where I and our five children would be now and that is all I want to tell you … not the long and tortuous journey to get here, just the facts.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">Our eldest son qualified as a doctor and is now a consultant and clinical director of a large hospital group; he has two children. The other son, who is child number four, is "something in the city" having qualified as a lawyer and a chartered accountant. He has had two wives and a child with each; they are a delight. Your favourite daughter is quite beautiful, works in television and has a lovely son of 16. She has done a good job with him and his half-brother.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">Daughter number two, and the middle child, suffered most from your desertion; she finally had massive brain surgery in her early 20s to remove scarring from her temporal lobe, which she acquired when she had that febrile convulsion after we left her with her grandmother one awful weekend – do you remember the dramatic flight from Scotland to see her, a nine-month-old baby, in a huge hospital cot? She overcame so much, has a degree in psychology, lives in France and was married last year. That brings me to our baby who is now 39; she is a head gardener in a country home, single and a life-enhancer to all she meets.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">God, you have missed it all … the valleys of despair and the mountaintops of pride and delight that can only come from loving unconditionally. Where are you now?</span></p><p><span style="font-size:100%;">http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/oct/17/letter-to-exhusband<br /></span></p> </div>MyOwnThinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02525780284198252246noreply@blogger.com15